Many many people (none) mostly (never) ask me about my Tinder habits.
They wish to know what would make me select one man over a million others.
I tell them I’m substantially not the best person to ask: a) since I’m not on Tinder, and b) because, on another dating site, we once wrote we was ‘anal’ in my form bio. That turn of unjustifiable recognition was worrying.
Anyway, we know people still like to get dating recommendation from me – so let me be some help.
I’ve asked some lullie women what would make them appropriate right (ignoring fancying the fudge out of someone) – to give you lullie men some-more of a possibility of capturing them. Ready?
Learn to spell – good spelling turns women on.
Jasmine, 32, from Bradford:
Sally, 29, from Lewes:
A man who can spell.
Chris, 43, from north London:
I didn’t lie, did I?
But it can’t all be shout-outs to Dick Tionary and Theo Saurus, can it? (I am so very, very sorry.)
What else creates women appropriate right?
Carla, 33, from Aldershot:
Good spelling, and someone who actually writes a (hopefully funny) bio.
Off the top of my head, one that done me appropriate right was a man who pronounced his hobbies were volcano bungee jumping and extreme ironing. we like a man who can iron.
And Kirsty, 35, from Aberdeen, what about you? What gives you the Tinder tingle?
Humour spilling from the intro difference is a big turn-on. Same for intelligence. Cooking and booze references. Liking Scrabble. (I have it in my own bio, LOL)
Someone who likes kids and animals. Cute pets.
Someone who appears open and accessible (prescriptive lists of what a lady should be for him is a major red flag).
And a decent volume of blurb. That means they won’t open with ‘Hi x’.
Debbie, 36, from Malvern agrees that bio is all-important.
A short, witty, honest description.
They’re customarily profiles with photos of their children or them with their ex-partners.
And then it’s wanton messages. After observant ‘Hello’ [it’s] ‘I would hook you over and f*** you’.
Please note: Debbie does not do gymnasts.
Marie, 38, from Tring, would appropriate right for a good bio, too.
It doesn’t have to be an award-winning bit of writing: just honest and original. No cliche crap, please.
I don’t caring if you’re equally happy fibbing on the lounge or going for prolonged walks. Good. Walk. Don’t stop walking.
I swiped right on a man once who really done me giggle about being a bit podgy.
He pronounced he couldn’t distortion about having the ideal physique and that he ‘missed his feet’. Haha. Instantly done me comfortable to him. Instantly knew he’d be a laugh.
Nina, 28, from Luton:
Don’t take this the wrong way but I’ve swiped right since the man looked like my dad.
I don’t wish to date my father – but he reminded me of my father and that done me feel we could instinctively trust him over all the other men on Tinder. And we antiquated for a year so we was arrange of right.
It’s tummy feeling, we suppose.
Terri, 49, from Bishop’s Stortford:
I consider a lot of my right swipes are down to a tummy feeling about the man, which we know isn’t very useful for men reading this. But we do consider you get a feeling about them from their bio – honeyed boys put the bid in; players just run out bulls*** lines – or write very little.
If they don’t deposit in their bio, because would they deposit in you? Just a numbers diversion to them.
And their photos give loads divided about them too.
Kirsty from Aberdeen again:
You need to see good photos. And not all selfies.
A good collection, too: with family, with friends, in good places. Not 4 opposite selfies of you sitting on your lounge – and one of you with a caged tiger on holiday.
Would you appropriate right if you didn’t find the form photo hot?
Jenny, 48, from London:
Definitely. Photos can be too hot. If the man is too cute, is the photo really him? And if it is, I’d prefer my physique not to be seen by this Adonis.
Natural, honest photos, please. Lots so we can see what you demeanour like.
But we do know photos can’t capture everything. Tone of voice… Way they lift themselves… Sexiness… Photos don’t show you that.
Swipe right, meet, and then decide.
Are we back to tummy feeling, then?
Debbie from Malvern again:
Yes. Wasn’t certain about a man’s profile. But went for it.
We exchanged two messages, my tummy really pronounced no, and we deserted him gently.
And then he sent these…
‘You’re a bit defensive and, let’s face it, scared. It’s frightful to take risks – but no risks; no reward. Also, it’s critical to follow your tummy – no need to be definitive.’
‘You and your tummy can change their mind tomorrow.
‘From where we am, I’m the one who should consider about self-preservation.’
‘I feel that if we do more, we will be some-more trustworthy than you will be. It’s a dangerous situation.’
Wow. But when love’s right, it’s right. And, also, ‘Police!’.