Australia, home to boiling sun, koalas, kangaroos and the many disgusting(ly amazing?) food creations famous to man.
Our Aussie cousins were the ones to deliver the bellies to the freakshake – indulgent, calorie-laden and God damn tough to eat versions of the medium milkshake.
They were the ones to start slinging Nutella in everything, including Nutella round milkshakes, Nutella doughnut kebabs and Nutella fries.
They’ve also brought us such delights as the Hamdog (a hamburger/hot dog hybrid), cheeseburger croissants, Pokémon burgers, and the sweet-looking nonetheless savoury-tasting rainbow burger.
But we all know desserts are where their strengths distortion and the country has proven this once some-more with the origination of the doughnut break container (DSP for short).
‘What in dough’s name is a “snack pack”?’ we hear you cry.
Well, dear reader – it originates from the halal break container (HSP), which is a renouned takeaway shop plate consisting of a big raise of (halal) doner kebab beef and chips, smothered in one or some-more sauces, like garlic, chilli and barbecue.
You can also supplement cheese, jalapeños, mayo, houmous – you get the picture.
So anyways, a grill called Pizzeria Express in Melbourne’s Ringwood have taken the halal break container and given it a sweet, honeyed makeover.
The doughnut break packs embody of a outrageous raise of small, sweetened homemade doughnuts smothered in chocolate sauce, and your choice of toppings.
Toppings embody Kinder bars, Snickers, Ferrero Rocher, packet Aero and…Nutella (obvs).
They are the brainchild of Pizzeria Express owners Mark and Cassy Micheli, who clearly don’t give a damn about your blood sugar levels.
According to the Herald Sun, the doughnut aristocrat and black of Melbourne contend they’ve had to extend their opening hours due to demand.
They’ve even had business travelling in from places as distant as Geelong, which is over an hour’s drive from the restaurant.
The couple used to make just one collection of mix a night, and now they’re being forced to make seven.
They’ve also upped their Nutella use from 6kg to 30kg, a day.
The DSP creators contend that any break container serves two people, but c’mon – who has self control like that?
Burger freakshakes have crept over here, so for the adore of the arteries, we urge these honeyed break packs don’t.
Please. We plead you. Save us from ourselves.
*Books moody to Melbourne*